ENERGY

ENHANCEMENT MEDITATION

MEDITATION HEAD

 HOME PAGE

 

GAIN ENERGY APPRENTICE LEVEL1

THE ENERGY BLOCKAGE REMOVAL PROCESS

LEVEL2

THE KARMA CLEARING PROCESS APPRENTICE LEVEL3

MASTERY OF  RELATIONSHIPS TANTRA APPRENTICE LEVEL4

 

STUDENTS EXPERIENCES  2005 AND 2006

 

MORE STUDENTS EXPERIENCES

 - FIFTY FULL TESTIMONIALS

2003 COURSE

Kabir

THE GUEST

Chapter 14: I am not a person

Question 6

 

 

Energy Enhancement                Enlightened Texts                Kabir                The Guest

 

 

The sixth question:

Question 6

OSHO, I HAVE ASKED THIS QUESTION OF MYSELF -- IN MYRIAD WAYS FOR SEVERAL WEEKS NOW, HAVE WATCHED IT CHANGE AND SHRINK AS WITNESSING BROUGHT INSIGHTS, YET LEAVING THE ESSENCE UNTOUCHED.

LAST YEAR I LEFT, OVERFLOWING WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YOUR COMPASSION, LOVE, UNDERSTANDING AND A DEEP SENSE OF PERSONAL CONNECTION AND LOVE FOR YOU. YOUR PARTING WORDS, "HURRY BACK", SPOKE TO ME FROM YOUR BOOKS AND TAPES AND THE FOCUS OF RETURNING NEVER WAVERED, ONLY DEEPENED, LEAVING ALL ELSE POINTLESS.

NOW I AM HERE AND I FEEL LOST AND DISORIENTED AND ALIEN. I LISTEN TO THE MAGIC OF YOU IN DISCOURSE WHERE I USED TO PULSATE WITH YOU, AND MY EYES ARE DRY: THEY ARE QUITE WET AS I WRITE THIS.

WHERE IS THE LOVE AND THE CONNECTION I FELT FOR YOU AS MY MASTER, SUCH AN INCREDIBLE BEING, THAT HAS SO PENETRATED ME AND MY LIFE FOR THE LAST YEAR AND A HALF?

WHAT IS HAPPENING?

Prem Sharda,

IT IS natural, it is expected. The last time you were here, you were here without any expectations. You were simply here, with no motivation. You enjoyed being in my presence. You were open, available, because you were functioning from a state of not-knowing.

Now, coming back, it is not the same thing. I am the same, the whole situation is the same, but you are not the same: now you are functioning out of a state of knowing. You are expecting things now which you were not expecting the first time.

This happens to almost everybody: the first time you come you are very innocent. My love simply reaches to you, there is no barrier. My compassion overwhelms you. You cannot believe it, it is unbelievable, it is too much. Then you go back with all those memories rambling in your mind: now those memories start becoming desires. Now those memories say to you, "Go back! Much more is going to happen. If the first time it happened so deeply, this time it will happen even more deeply. The first time you were just an amateur, now you are an adept. So much more is going to happen."

For all these months that you have been away, you have been dreaming, desiring, fantasizing. Now you are here with all these fantasies, desires, expectations -- and your eyes are dry, and nothing is happening.

You will have to drop your expectations. You will have to become innocent again. You will have to start functioning from not-knowing again, otherwise you will be unnecessarily creating a hell for yourself. And it will be an absolutely private hell, because others, just sitting by your side, are in heaven.

But don't be worried about it, this is absolutely normal and natural. This happens to everybody, Sharda; at least once, it happens. If you are intelligent then it happens only once, if you are not intelligent then it happens many times. Then each time you go and you come back again, you do the same foolish thing.

l cannot fulfill your expectations, I cannot fulfill your fantasies, I cannot fulfill your desires. I can fulfill you, but not your mind. Now you have brought a big mind with you. It will be difficult and hard to drop it, but there is no other way. You will have to drop it, and the sooner you drop it, the better.

Sharda is a very intellectual woman, very clever, calculating, logical, rational: She functions as a money-therapist in the West. She helps people to get more money, to earn more, to create money, to attract money towards themselves. So you can understand, she has a certain very, very intellectual mind. She is not intuitive. It was a miracle that the first time she was here she fell in love. Money-therapists are not expected to fall in love! I was also surprised.

Now the money-therapist is back again, and with all the ideas about how to have more -- more of those experiences that had happened last time -- -how to attract those same spaces again. That is creating trouble for you, Sharda. You have eaten the fruit of the Tree of Knowledge, and paradise is lost. Please vomit it... just throw it out of your system. When you are here, just be like an innocent child, and not only with me -- that is very easy, to be innocent with me -- you have to be innocent with the commune too. Put aside your knowledge, put aside all your expertise about money.

The commune also functions through money -- it has to function, there is no other way -- but the commune moves in a very illogical way. That too creates problems for Sharda. To her expert eye, she cannot believe how things are happening: they can happen better, they can be done more methodologically.

But with me everything always remains a chaos. I love it! I never allow anything to settle, because once things settle people start dying, people start becoming zombies; so nothing is ever settled. I go on separating couples, I go on changing their rooms, their jobs -- every possible way to unsettle you! I never allow a single moment of respite, rest, so that you can say, "Now I have arrived." The moment you say "I have arrived" something is created for you so that you have to gather your luggage again and move.

Sharda's mind is bound to be in great difficulty; I can understand. I don't know anything about money, although money comes. I am not a money-therapist, but whenever money is needed, money comes: somebody simply comes with the money! And this has been so my whole life. I don't have a single rupee -- you can see, I don't even have pockets! I have lived for many, many years without money. And I have not lived like a beggar; that is not my way! I live like an emperor, and without money. What Buddha could never manage, I am managing. He was an emperor; then he could not manage to live it, the freedom of a beggar. To live the freedom of a beggar he had to leave his kingdom. Then he lived free, but he had to live like a beggar, begging.

I am living in absolute freedom, and yet I am not living like a beggar. And I don't go outside my room, but things happen. I cannot tell you the secrets; in fact, there are none. I don't know myself -- how it goes on. But once you disappear, God takes over. Then it is His responsibility and His worry. I never worry about anything, and I don't think of anything as my responsibility. If this commune grows, good; if it disappears, very good! It doesn't matter either way.

But I can understand Sharda's mind: she must be feeling in difficulty. She wants to help the commune -- good

wishes, good intentions! -- but then there will be conflict, because this commune is run with no scientific approach towards ANYTHING. It is a totally different approach -- paradoxical, illogical, intuitive.

I am trying to get this whole commune to function through the right hemisphere of the brain. And Sharda, you are entrapped in the left hemisphere; that is creating the whole trouble. But now you have come for one year -- that too is calculation. I wanted you to come forever. I wanted you to simply bum all the bridges there, but your money-therapist mind... yoU would like to manage both worlds. Who knows? -- if you don't like it here you would like to keep the home back there so that you can always go back. You are moving in a rational way.

I wanted you to come back forever. That would have been a great chance for shifting from the left hemisphere to the right hemisphere... because every risk throws you towards the intuitive, towards the supra-logical. Every risk is helpful in transforming your being. But you managed, you have come for one year; that is a compromise. One year is a long time, so you have felt contented that at least you are coming for one year. But one year is one year; it will be gone soon. And you know that you have a home there and you can always go back.

You have not yet entered into my boat. You are still keeping your separate boat. Nothing is wrong in keeping it separate, but then be conscious, be alert that you are doing it. Then you are only half-heartedly with me.

And you are no longer young. What is left there in the West? Even young people are here who don't want to go back. For them there is everything in the West; what is there in the East for them? They are young, and the West can supply everything that they would like to enjoy. You have enjoyed your life, you have seen everything there. America is finished for you!

Have a look again, a very dispassionate look at your mind, and you will find what I am saying. You are still being calculating with me, and then distance remains. You have to be absolutely non-calculating. You have to be like Mukta.

She comes from a very rich family. She is Greek, basically logical, but the day I told her, "Finish things there and come," she said, "Okay." And she FINISHED EVERYTHING and has never looked back. Even when her father was dying, and he was asking again and again for her to come at least to see him, she was not willing. I had to push her to go. I had to simply order her to go, but she was not willing to go. She had completely forgotten, as if that other world had never existed. This is the way to be with me! This is the way to become part of my heart. This is the way to melt in me. And with no expectation -- she has not asked for a single experience. She has not asked for a single thing in all these years she has been here, and she had given everything to the commune!

Only such surrender, such trust, such unmotivated love, can bring the transformation that you long for.

Sharda, your longing is right, but you will have to change your mind. Your mind is wrong; it is expert in things which are hindrances here.

 

Next: Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 7

 

Energy Enhancement            Enlightened Texts           Kabir           The Guest

 

 

Chapter 14

 

  • Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 1
    Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 1 , WHAT IS RECEPTIVITY? at energyenhancement.org

  • Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 2
    Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 2, WHY ARE YOU SO MUCH AGAINST PHILOSOPHY? at energyenhancement.org

  • Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 3
    Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 3, I LOVE YOU. IN A Sannyas MAGAZINE YOU SAID THAT YOU ARE NOT A PERSON. THEN WHAT ARE YOU? at energyenhancement.org

  • Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 4
    Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 4, WHY DID FRIEDRICH NIETZSCHE DECLARE THAT GOD IS DEAD? at energyenhancement.org

  • Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 5
    Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 5, HOW CAN I GET BACK THE WILL TO LIVE? at energyenhancement.org

  • Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 6
    Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 6, I HAVE ASKED THIS QUESTION OF MYSELF -- IN MYRIAD WAYS FOR SEVERAL WEEKS NOW, HAVE WATCHED IT CHANGE AND SHRINK AS WITNESSING BROUGHT INSIGHTS, YET LEAVING THE ESSENCE UNTOUCHED. LAST YEAR I LEFT, OVERFLOWING WITH THE EXPERIENCE OF YOUR COMPASSION, LOVE, UNDERSTANDING AND A DEEP SENSE OF PERSONAL CONNECTION AND LOVE FOR YOU. YOUR PARTING WORDS, 'HURRY BACK', SPOKE TO ME FROM YOUR BOOKS AND TAPES AND THE FOCUS OF RETURNING NEVER WAVERED, ONLY DEEPENED, LEAVING ALL ELSE POINTLESS. NOW I AM HERE AND I FEEL LOST AND DISORIENTED AND ALIEN. I LISTEN TO THE MAGIC OF YOU IN DISCOURSE WHERE I USED TO PULSATE WITH YOU, AND MY EYES ARE DRY: THEY ARE QUITE WET AS I WRITE THIS. WHERE IS THE LOVE AND THE CONNECTION I FELT FOR YOU AS MY MASTER, SUCH AN INCREDIBLE BEING, THAT HAS SO PENETRATED ME AND MY LIFE FOR THE LAST YEAR AND A HALF? WHAT IS HAPPENING? at energyenhancement.org

  • Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 7
    Talks on Kabir, The Guest Chapter 14: I am not a person, Question 7, I KNOW FOR SURE THAT MY WIFE IS UTTERLY FAITHFUL TO ME, BUT STILL DOUBT GOES ON LINGERING SOMEWHERE INSIDE ME. WHAT SHOULD I DO TO GET RID OF THE DOUBT? at energyenhancement.org

 

 

 
ENERGY ENHANCEMENT
TESTIMONIALS
EE LEVEL1   EE LEVEL2
EE LEVEL3   EE LEVEL4   EE FAQS
NEWSLETTER SIGN UP
NAME:
EMAIL:

Google

Search energyenhancement.org Search web