Between Adam and Jesus

Third Question



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The third question:

Question 3


Yes, the implications of sannyas become clear only when you are a sannyasin, never before. There are many people who would like to take sannyas, who would like to be initiated on the path, but they want to know what it means before they take the jump. That is impossible; nothing can be said to them. They want to be convinced before they take the decision. No, you cannot be convinced because it is not a question of intellect, it is something to be experienced. One knows about it only by being it, and there is no other way.

So those who think that first they need an intellectual conviction will miss the opportunity available. They will miss the door. Sannyas is only for those who are courageous enough to move in the dark, to move in the unknown. Yes, the night is very dark, and the point at which you are standing is such that from there you cannot see any ray of light. In fact, you are standing with closed eyes and you say,'First, convince us intellectually that there is light. Only then will we open the eyes.' How is it possible? -- because light can be known only when you open the eyes. How can you prove that light exists to a man who is standing with closed eyes, and who insists, and insists logically,'Why should I open my eyes if there is no light? Why should I make the effort? First prove to me that there is light, then I will open my eyes.' But how can you prove that there is light? The only proof is to see it. The only proof of the pudding is in eating it.

'The implications of sannyas are just now becoming clear to me.'

Once you are a sannyasin, by and by, implications become more and more clear. There are infinite implications. The more you grow, the more they will become clear. It is not going to be an intellectual convict it is going to be an existential conversion -- hence the fear.

'Your power over us becomes awesome.'

That's one of the basic fears, because whenever you love somebody, the power of the other becomes awesome And THIS is no ordinary love; it is not love of the body, it is ultimate love. Once you fall in love with me you ar. already disappearing. Fear grips you -- 'What is going to happen?' -- are you going to dissolve completely? The temptation will arise to escape, the temptation will arise to say 'no' to me, the temptation will arise to defend yourself against me. But this is the paradox: if you defend yourself against me you are destroying yours because then you will remain the old, the repetitive, the rotten. If you don't defend yourself against me, if you open the doors, in the beginning it may look destructive, but soon you will realize that the destruction was just a preparation to create something. Each creation needs to be begun by destruction, an equal amount of destruction is needed. If I am going to create you, totally new, then I will have to destroy you TOTALLY.

Right now, you are just a mechanical thing. You go on repeating yourself, like a gramophone record which is stuck somewhere and goes on repeating the same line again and again and again. Just watch your life: have you not become a gramophone record, stuck? -- and the needle goes on moving in the same groove -- and goes on repeating the same thing every day: the same anger the same sex, the same jealousy, the same hatred, the same possessiveness, the same greed. Have you ever done anything new?

I was reading a limerick yesterday. I liked it.

There was a young man

who said,'Damn,

I have just realized that I am,

a being that moves

in predictable grooves.

Not even a bus, I'm a tram!'

Just watch yourself and you will find yourself not even a bus, but a tram: fixed grooves, well-trodden paths, repetitively. And you become more and more efficient in them. You completely forget how to live. It is as if you are being lived by a mechanical life; you are not living it because you are not conscious about it.

It once happened to a man who was travelling by rail: he noticed that another man who was his sole companion in the compartment was behaving in an unusual way. For some time he seemed to be chuckling to himself very happily, and then a serious look would come over his face and he would make a gesture of impatience before resuming his chuckles again. After a while, the first man could not stand it any longer and said,'Excuse my asking, sir, but what is it that amuses you so much?'

'Funny stories, of course,' he promptly replied,'I am telling myself funny stories.'

'How very interesting,' murmured the first man soothingly, and then added,'but every now and then you look very serious. Why is that?'

'That is when it is a story I have heard before.'

This is how things go on. If you yourself are telling the story, how can you tell the new story? All stories are heard before; you can just repeat. Your life cannot be a life of newness, of freshness, of morning. Your life is bound to be stale, stuffed with just repetitions; at the most an efficient mechanism, but no consciousness.

So whenever you are ready to take the journey for the unknown, the pilgrimage towards the divine, fear will arise -- fear of losing that which you have never had, fear of losing life. Life you have never had -- just a mechanical thing: the fear of losing a repetitive efficiency, the fear of losing your old pattern. It may be comfortable and convenient, but it is not alive. There is nothing like death, because death is the most comfortable state of being, convenient. In a grave you will be perfectly comfortable and convenient, and there is no trouble. Life always creates new troubles. Those troubles are not really troubles. If you look rightly, they are challenges to grow.

I am a challenge. Only cowards can escape from he Those who are brave have to make up their minds to move into the unknown, to go in search of that which they don't know. But you feel a deep urge. You feel that some freedom is possible. It is just a vague feeling no but if you move into the unknown, soon it becomes the reality.

'Your power over us becomes awesome. You can push us far beyond the limitations of our personalities.'

That's my whole effort: to push you in fact, OUT of your personalities, so that your personality drops. Th personality is nothing but a mask, a PERSONA. It is false It is just a created thing; it is not your reality, it is not your essence. It is just a cultivated thing around you, just a decoration; it is not you. It is hiding you, and because of it you are unable to know yourself, who you are. It has become the only hindrance: layers upon layer of persona, of personality. And you have completely forgotten who you are, the original face. You cannot even remember that you ever had an original face.

My whole effort is to push you out of your personalities. If even for a single moment the personalities drop and you are out of them, as if you were standing nude without your clothes, that one moment will have tremendous implications for your life. You will never be the same again because now you have known your original face, now you know who you are. And once you know who you are, you are total freedom.

Personality is a bondage. It is as if you have become fixed only to being something, and you could have been all things. Personality is a fixed, routine way of being. You could have been all things and you have become just a grocer. You could have been a painter also, a poet also, a mystic also, and you have just become a grocer! Everybody is born with infinite possibilities, and almost everybody dies by becoming a grocer. Just think! That's why you look so miserable -- because you have been infinite and you have become bounded, finite.

'Yet our personalities persist, and I find myself frightened by things I am doing which seem incongruous with my character.'

I am against character, because character is a fixity. Character has a solidness about it; it is stony. Character means repetitiveness: you go on repeating yourself -- that is your 'character'. When somebody says that you are a good man, what is he saying? He is saying that you are predictable -- in the past you have been good, in the future you are going to repeat the same. When somebody says that you are a bad man, what is he saying? He is saying that you are predictable -- that in the future also you are going to repeat the same song, you are going to tell the same story.

A real man is always unpredictable. He is freedom. He has no character because each moment he finds a new challenge, each moment he moves in a new dimension, and each moment he looks with fresh eyes. Each moment he responds again and again from a new vision. He is never old; he is always young.

In India we have not depicted Buddha, Mahavir, or Krishna as old men. It is not that they never became old; they became old, but we have not depicted that. Not even a single image of Buddha exists which shows him old. Not that he never became old; he became old, but we know that he never became 'old'. Deep down, he remained always fresh, unpredictable, young, infinitely young. Even on the last day, in the last moments of his life he was young and fresh. Whatsoever he said, the last words that he uttered, they too were as fresh as ever; no old age, no repetition.

Remember, character means a fixity, as if you were already dead. In a drama people have characters, but in life they should not have because a drama is predestined-everything is already fixed: who is who and what is going to happen. Nothing new is allowed: that is the meaning. In a drama there are characters -- a Jesus has to be a Jesus. He cannot turn in the middle and say,'I am not!' He has simply to follow, tram-like. He has tc repeat a particular routine.The man who wrote the play has fixed every role; now there is no change possible. In life, there are no characters.

All over the world there is arising a new sort of drama which will not have characters. It will be more true to life. It is a new sort of drama -- you can almost call it 'no-drama' -- nobody knows what is going to happen. People simply start from anywhere, out of the blue, and there is no distinction between the audience and the stage. There should not be because in life there is no audience and no stage, there is no separation between the actors and the onlookers. The new drama must be played in such a way that if somebody from the audience feels to take part, immediately he jumps into it. And by hi very jump, the drama changes. He will bring something; nobody knows what, and nobody knows where it is going to end.

It is just like life -- it begins, it ends, but in fact there is no beginning and no end. It is always the middle. You came into the world, the world didn't begin with you. You were born on a certain date; the drama was going on, things were already -- on the way. You simply came onto the stage, started doing things of your own, and started changing the whole character of the world drama. And then, just in the middle, one day you die, and by your death you again change: your wife may get married to somebody else now, your children will not be the same as you wished them to be -- the whole story is going to be different.

Life is like an ocean -- wild. Waves upon waves come and go and nobody knows. And that's the beauty of it. A real man is wild; he has no character. I am not saying that he is not good. When I say that he is characterless, I am not saying that he is evil. You say that a person is characterless when he is immoral; that is wrong. He also has a character, an immoral character. Don't call him characterless.'Characterless' is a tremendously beautiful word -- only for a Buddha, or a Jesus, or a Krishna can you use that. Don't use it for ordinary people. Just ordinary people you call characterless. They have their character, they have their fixity, they have their routine of life. They may be bad, their characters may be bad, but they are not characterless. Only a Buddha is characterless. Characterlessness is the profoundest beauty possible because it means: a totally new response each moment. Each moment a Buddha faces life, a Jesus faces life. He does not carry ready-made answers. What he is going to say, nobody knows; what he is going to do, nobody knows; how he is going to act, nobody knows, not even he himself. If he himself knows, then he is just telling himself funny stories. Then it is all foolish.

I don't know what sentence is going to follow this one, I don't know what act is going to follow: this is freedom. Then I am not confined.

I can understand your difficulty. Whatsoever I am doing is trying to destroy your character. That was the condemnation of Socrates. The court in Athens had decided that he destroys the character of young people. It was absolutely true! That was the evidence against Christ also: that he destroys the character of young people. It has always been so. A Socrates, a Jesus, they are destroyers of character. Not that they are creators of immorality -- they bring the greatest morality there is: the morality of freedom, the morality of spontaneity. The only moral act is that act which is spontaneous, which comes out of your totality and is not just from your head. I will be destroying your character.

People say the same thing against me, that I am a dangerous man. I am! They are perfectly true. My whole effort is in how to destroy your character so that at least you can become a bus, so that you don't move on rails. You can have a little freedom.

Fear is natural. I am not saying that you can drop that fear, but there is one thing that I would like to say: in spite of the fear you can come with me. And that is the only way. If you wait, that once you have dropped the fear then you will come and follow me, then you never will. Follow, in spite of the fear. Let the fear be there, it is natural; but don't follow it, follow me. The fear is there, human, natural -- but come, follow me. By and by, the more you become attuned to the inner freedom the inner sky, the fear will disappear because through this characterlessness you are growing, you are becoming more mature, you are ripening. Now the morality will not be forced from outside, it will flow from your inside. It will be your inwardness, it will be your own understanding and consciousness. It will not be a conscience any more.

The conscience is given by the society; consciousness you have to achieve. The society goes on telling you,'This is right, and that is wrong' -- that is conscience. It becomes ingrained, implanted in you. You go on repeating it. That is worthless; that is not the real thing The real thing is your own consciousness. It carries no ready-made answers: what is wrong and what is right, no. But immediately, in whatever situation arises, it gives you light -- you know immediately what to do. And that doing is total. That act is total because it is not being done because the society says so, it is done because you know it that way. In that moment the decision takes shape; it comes out of your innermost core. This is freedom, and this freedom is the goal. Don't stop before you have attained it.

Fear will be there. There are many hazards on the path: many times you may go astray, many times you will feel tired, exhausted, many times you will find excuses to sit by the side of the road. But remember again and again, that unless you have attained to that consciousness which can act spontaneously, you have not fulfilled your being. You are betraying God, you are betraying the Whole. And how can you be happy, how can you be blissful if you betray the original source? Then you will remain miserable. Your misery is just an indication that you are not doing the right thing, and the right thing is not what is said by the society to be right. The right thing is that which you come to understand through your understanding. Be a light unto yourself -- that is the right thing.


Next: Chapter 2, Between Adam and Jesus, Fourth Question


Energy Enhancement          Enlightened Texts          Christianity          Come Follow Yourself



Chapter 2





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