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Upanishads

PHILOSOPHIA ULTIMA

Chapter-16

This is Far Out

Third Question

 

 

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And the last question

Question 3

OSHO:

I FEEL LIKE THE GUY WITH THE GREEN HORSE. HELP!

Big Prem

A GREEN HORSE WON'T DO HERE -- paint it orange. And, moreover, if you can find a donkey that will be far better, because in a poor country like India riding on a horse is a luxury. People will not forgive you -- they cannot forgive me. It will be better if you choose a donkey.

The donkey represents the poor and it also represents the religious. It is a very religious animal -- sad, serious, always in a philosophic mood. And once you paint it orange it is a saint, a mahatma! And then you can write on your donkey 'His Holiness, Paramahansa, Donkey-ji Maharaj'. Then you are sure to find a man -- that's what she is asking for.

Now Big Prem is really big, and to find a man bigger than Big Prem is a little difficult. But right now one man is free... and be quick! Divya has really given total freedom to Hamid, REAL freedom! First she was insisting, "You have to live in the room so that I can give you total freedom, because if you live in another room then how will I give you total freedom! I have to practice total freedom and you have to live in my room!" But finally he escaped, so now he is free, Big Prem. Before some other woman gets hold of him... and sooner or later somebody is going to get hold of him, it won't be long. Somebody may have already caught him, because men are so foolish -- and particularly Iranians -- how long can they remain free?

So from this lecture, Buddha Hall, you immediately rush towards Ayatollah Rahullah Hamidullah! Catch hold of him! But if he is already caught then it is difficult. There is only one thing you can do: you can go with your donkey, painted orange, into the Blue Diamond's manager's office. I have received his research -- he may be of great help to you. He seems to be a really alive man in this town of Poona -- in this Mohenjodaro, the city of the dead! He must be an alive man because he has sent his research work. It is printed on a simple card -- his whole research. He has sent it to me but I will give it to Big Prem because she can use it. I will read this research paper to you:

Dear Osho:

Scientists report... a stroke of genius:

Scientists have determined that the average time of love-making is four minutes. The average number of strokes per minute is nine, making the average love-making thirty-six strokes. Since the average length is six inches, the average girl receives two hundred and sixteen inches or eighteen feet per love-making. The average girl does it three times per week, fifty-two weeks annually -- one hundred and fifty times eighteen makes 2,700 feet, or just over half a mile. So, my girl, if you are not getting your half a mile every year, why not let the man who gave you this card help you catch up?

The name of the Blue Diamond's manager is Mr Pandit -- you take this card to him. If you cannot get hold of Hamidullah, then you get hold of Mr. Pandit! Of course you will not be satisfied by half a mile... Big Prem is really big!

 

Next: Chapter 16, This is Far Out, Fourth Question

 

Energy Enhancement          Enlightened Texts         Upanishads           Philosophia Ultima

 

 

Chapter 16

 

 

 

 
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